We have just completed our first Beta session of “AMP>D! Gaining Momentum in Life” with a great group of men at The Summit Church. AMP>D! is a unique process which provides a practical framework for gaining postive traction in areas of your life where you feel defeated, ineffective or just plain stuck. Through a series of highly interactive group sessions, mini-challenges and real-life applications we give participants the tools and insight to become more effective and purposeful in their daily lives. If you are interested in learning more about our AMP>D! seminar or small group material please contact me at khollaway@39principle.com.
Some poignant words from Adrian Rogers / Love Worth Finding (www.lfw.org)
DEVOTIONAL THOUGHT: For the first time in history, man is afraid of what he knows. His head and his hands have outrun his heart, and we are being faced with things for which we have no answers — the plague of AIDS, the tinderbox in the Middle East, the outbreaks of famine, the irregular weather disturbances, and much more. But, we don’t have to wring our hands and say, “What is the world coming to?” We can look up and say, “Who is the world coming to?” It’s coming to Jesus! Praise God!
BIBLE MEDITATION: John 12:32 - “And I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto Me.”
God has created each of us uniquely, but we must not forget that He is the fullness of all things - Head, Heart and Hands.
A good friend of mine sent this to me. It’s really one of those chain letters you get that’s been passed through a million other people. I couldn’t find an attributable source so I’ll post it as anonymous unless someone corrects me. Anyway I did the math and I have 1,857 Saturdays left. Man…that sort of brings it home. Make ‘em count boyz!
Dan
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The older I get, the more I enjoy Saturday morning. Perhaps it’s the quiet solitude that comes with being the first to rise, or maybe it’s the unbounded joy of not having to be at work. Either way, the first few hours of a Saturday morning are most enjoyable.
A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the garage with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other. What began as a typical Saturday morning turned into one of those lessons that life seems to hand you from time to time. Let me tell you about it:
I turned the dial up into the phone portion of the band on my ham radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning swap net. Along the way, I came across an older sounding chap, with a tremendous signal and a golden voice. You know the kind; he sounded like he should be in the broadcasting business. He was telling whomever he was talking with something about a thousand marbles. I was intrigued and stopped to listen to what he had to say.
Well, Tom, it sure sounds like you’re busy with your job. I’m sure they pay you well but it’s a shame you have to be away from home and your family so much. Hard to believe a young fellow should have to work sixty or seventy hours a week to make ends meet. It’s too bad you missed your daughters dance recital, he continued; Let me tell you something that has helped me keep my own priorities. And that’s when he began to explain his theory of a thousand marbles.
You see, I sat down one day and did a little arithmetic. The average person lives about seventy-five years. I know, some live more and some live less, but on average, folks live about seventy-five years.
Now then, I multiplied 75 times 52 and I came up with 3,900, which is the number of Saturdays that the average person has in their entire lifetime. Now, stick with me, Tom, I’m getting to the important part.
It took me until I was fifty-five years old to think about all this in any detail, he went on, and by that time I had lived through over twenty-eight hundred Saturdays. I got to thinking that if I lived to be seventy-five, I only had about a thousand of them left to enjoy. So I went to a toy store and bought every single marble they had. I ended up having to visit three toy stores to round up 1,000 marbles. I took them home and put them inside a large, clear plastic container right here in the shack next to my gear.
Every Saturday since then, I have taken one marble out and thrown it away. I found that by watching the marbles diminish, I focused more on the really important things in life.
There’s nothing like watching your time here on this earth run out to help get your priorities straight.
Now let me tell you one last thing before I sign off with you and take my lovely wife out for breakfast. This morning, I took the very last marble out of the container. I figure that if I make it until next Saturday then I have been given a little extra time. And the one thing we can all use is a little more time.
It was nice to meet you Tom. I hope you spend more time with your family, and I hope to meet you again here on the band. This is a 75 year old man, K9NZQ, clear and going QRT, good morning!
You could have heard a pin drop on the band when this fellow signed off. I guess he gave us all a lot to think about. I had planned to work on the antenna that morning, and then I was going to meet up with a few hams to work on the next club newsletter.
Instead, I went upstairs and woke my wife up with a kiss. C’mon honey, I’m taking you and the kids to breakfast.
“What brought this on?” She asked with a smile.
Oh, nothing special, it’s just been a long time since we spent a Saturday together with the kids. And hey, can we stop at a toy store while were out? I need to buy some marbles.
I was shocked and saddened to hear of Tim Russert’s sudden passing. I was in the front passenger seat of my friend Holt Condren’s truck. We were returning from a morning of rappelling and rock climbing with our oldest sons. It had been a beautiful morning with a light breeze and highlevel cloud overcast, temperatures hovering in the mid-80’s.
I always liked Tim. He seemed such an affable, energetic fellow, but there was a depth there than was unmistakable. The man was pretty incredible. He had a law degree, had worked on a congressional staff and single-handedly transformed the political pundit scene into respectable journalism. Though I’ve heard that his personal political beliefs were not exactly in line with my own, he brought a civility and professionalism to the political scene that you don’t get many other places. He once said that his job was to understand a politician’s positions and then to question and challenge the politician from the opposite viewpoint while never injecting his own personal agenda.
One of the hardest hitting thoughts about his passing was the fact that he had just returned from a trip to Italy celebrating his son’s graduation. His son is now without a father - and one who so obviously had a lot to give and teach. That prospect saddens me. But it goes deeper than that.
Some say that his sudden heart attack was from diabetes, heart disease and stress. One NBC insider said that it would take 4-5 men to do the work of Tim Russert. While that seems to be a noble legacy I can’t help but wonder how much time was lost investing in his own family and children. Undoubtedly they loved him, but was he so consumed by his work that he missed out on opportunities to pour himself into his children. I’ll probably never know that answer since I don’t really know the man or the family.
I do know myself and my family. This whole episode has caused me to pause and take stock in my own investing. Am I pouring into my children, and specifically my boys, all that I hope to? Life can be cut short at any moment and I don’t want to regret not having spent the quality time that I could have. Will it matter in eternity if I don’t get that one last promotion or if I miss one 30-minute conference call? It won’t. But it will matter that I failed to nuture my own sons in the way they should grow (see Proverbs).
So, don’t lose sight of the important things in life. Take the time to embrace your kids and tell them you love them, and then let your words turn into action. Spend a good quantity of quality time with them (no need to sacrifice one for the other). Have those hard conversations about the topics that really matter, and let your kids know that you care about them as people and that you want to help them grow into the men/women that God intended them to be.
I pray that Tim’s family will be comforted in their loss, and I hope that we can all take something from this unfortunate passing.
Okay, so that was a bit of a teaser title. My wife and I took our 7 kids to the movies on Sunday afternoon and we saw Kung-fu Panda. It was a really funny movie and the whole family had a blast. I don’t think I’ve laughed out loud in a theater like that in a long time. The story was fun and the animation was great. I couldn’t believe the amount of action and the “matrix-esque” slow motion scenes were perfect. The kids are already quoting lines and acting out different scenes…it’s pretty funny.
There were, however, some poignant scenes in the movie, and there were two of them that really stood out. The first scene that struck me was at the beginning of the movie when the Panda “Po” is having dreams of being a Kung-fu warrior when he is awakened by his father and told to get to work. The father is a noodle vendor and he asks Po what he was dreaming about. Po is embarrased to say Kung-fu so instead he says he was dreaming about noodles to appease his father.
The father is so excited and consumed with his own desire to have Po take over the “family business” that he fails to notice Po’s sadness. Even when Po attempts to tell his father that his dreams and ambitions line in other areas the father blindly pushes Po down the path of the family business.
How often do we as fathers do the same to our sons? We tend to think that our sons are just like us and that we share the same interests and dreams. Certainly there are instances where this is true, but more often than we would care to admit this is not the case. Every young man is unique and has his own “map” of Aptitudes, temperment, personality and strengths. Rather than projecting our interests and dreams onto our sons it is our responsibility to nurture them in their particular “bent” or Nature. This is most difficult when our son’s core Nature is strong in an area that we are low in.
If you find yourself struggling to “understand” your son, or you feel that he is resistant to your way of doing things (or seeing the world), then you should step back for a minute and try to understand where your son is coming from. One good way to do this is to have both your son and yourself take the 3:9 Principle survey. The personal Maps that are generated out of the survey will help you understand your son’s Core Nature and Core Aptitudes as well as your own. You can then find Aptitudes you have in common and where your differences lie. Believe me, this could be a life-changing event in your relationship.
The next scene that I found profound was a scene between the Master and his protege’ who has turned evil. There is a scene where the two are in a final showdown and the Master says that he has failed the protege’. It is at this time the protege’ reveals the depth of his anger and dissappointment - he says, “are you proud of me? All I ever wanted was for you to be proud of me”. For an instant you see the two empathize with each other and connect…then just as quickly the anger overwhelms the protege’ and he lashes out in violence.
Have you connected with your son and communicated to him how proud you are of him? Maybe you haven’t done that recently, or even ever. It is never to late to make that connection. Often our differences are what keep us from coming together.
Recently I had a friend go through the 3:9 Principle. After he had completed the survey and seen his Map he had a “eureka!” moment. He has two sons, one with whom he readily connects and one which he has struggled to develop a relationship with. After the survey he realized that he connected with the one some because they had very similar Maps, but the other son had a completely different Map result. He acknowledged that he had been trying to connect with both sons in the same manner - where his Core Aptitudes were the strongest.
The reality of the situation is that to connect with others we have to adjust our communication and our behavior to meet them in their Aptitudes. We must overcome our own fears and shortcomings and meet them in their comfort zone. Just as my friend realized that connecting with his sons meant approaching each in a unique way, so it is true with all our relationships.
The first step is to take the 3:9 Principle survey and discover your own unique Map. From there you can then develop strategies and plans for connecting to those around you - be it at work, home or in the community.
I found this video today on YouTube while evaluating another book.
It is an unbelievable understatement to say that the world is changing - we are all in a constantly accelerating and expanding whirlwind of choices. The funny thing about this is - even amongst all this “connectedness” and “social networking” - there is a gradually impending the feeling that you (as in I - an individual) are a singularity. You can probably feel it now. The questions that mankind have struggled with for millennia are now even more glaring - “What is life’s meaning?” and “Why am I here?”
Two big points. First, the world moves, change happens, shift happens, but ultimately problems are still problems - opportunities in disguise. Second, Christ is still Christ - always was and always will be unchanging. As an educator, a scientist, and a Christian - I firmly believe that your success in this world is NOT in memorizing 10 Trillion Bits of information. You success is determined by your understanding of your core natures and aptitudes and your ability to react to and solve problems that YOU are good at solving.
More profoundly is that as your sense of singularity grows - it gradually sheds light on the vacuum in your life that God wants to fill. That is where 3:9 is different. We recognize that God has given you a unique set of gifts - you were certainly wonderfully made! But as wonderfully as you were made, you are not complete. You are not complete without others in community, and you are not complete without God. God wants you to live in who and how he made you - but he also wants you to call on him for your daily needs.
Find yourself and Find God. Two amazing journeys! Take them with us!
1. The book has moved along considerably - including a completely re-written, and deeper, table of contents. We are very excited about delving into the content.
2. An introductory seminar powerpoint presentation has been constructed and is ready to be shared.
3. Version 2 of the survey with automated results delivery is being tested and should be ready at the end of the month.
I’ve been asking myself a lot of questions lately. Some of the questions have centered around the 3:9 Principle…
What makes an idea stand out? Why are some ideas more memorable than others? What is valuable about an idea?
Now there are certainly a litany of answers to these questions. Some could say the key lies in how profound the idea is…the “wow” factor. Some may say that it is about the applicability of the idea…the “makes sense” factor. Some probably say that the universality of the idea is most important…the “global” factor. I think these are all correct. In many ways the very concept of the 3:9 Principle validates these statements concerning ideas; what makes an idea stick with one person versus another is highly dependent on their natural bent - “wow” factors point to Heart-centric people, “makes sense” factor points to Hand-centric people and the “global” factors point to Head-centric people. Ultimately any idea is going to appeal people based on their perspective.
I think the power of the 3:9 Principle is that it can appeal to people regardless of their perspective…or better yet, because of their perspective. Heart-centrics find the 3:9 Principle as profound and impactful. Hand-centrics find it simple and tangible. Head-centrics find it academic and structured. This universality of appeal makes the 3:9 Principle extremely transferable - it is easily grasped and internalized by the vast majority of people.
What about you? As you learn about the 3:9 Principle and begin to explore your own mapping, what factor appeals to you the most? We would love to hear your thoughts on the matter…
You have to love plane rides since you get a couple of hours of uninterrupted time. I was able to make mucho progress on the 3:9 Beta version. I’ve eliminated 5 of the 20 forced rank questions. They were overall pretty good, but after moving some things around to replace bad or borderline items and eliminating 2 questions entirely. I dropped the number to 15. I’ve got my eyeball on 4 or 5 that will make up the “short-form” version. But I’ll need more data (300 or so responses) to make that jump statistically.
I also dropped all 20 of the scenario questions - there were a couple that were good but overall they didn’t add much except for “how did you answer that?” kinds of discussions. They didn’t reflect the natures nearly as well as the composite scores from the 20 forced ranks. Instead, I’ll be building some baseline questions to better reflect the 9 aptitudes, and use that as a multi-method validation/construct validity check.
Also, I’m expanding the “dad” questions a bit. In a week or so I should a working version of the BETA 1 survey, which many of you have been waiting for - I’ll work with our Survey Vendor to help us build an auto-response model so you can get your results right away. That’ll be very cool.
I was also able to script out a short video, so things are moving along nicely. So hang tight!
There was an interesting article by Tom Musback which was posted Yahoo! Hot Jobs (see attached Word document). It was a review of a book by Patrick Lencioni titled “The Three Signs of a Miserable Job”. The premise of the book is that while there are some bad jobs out there, the reality is that any job can be a “miserable” job. He defined a miserable job as one that makes a person “cynical and frustrated and demoralized when they go home at night”. It is certainly hard to argue that point!
The question for those of us considering the 3:9 Principle is, “How does our Nature effect our work, or our view of work?”. Mr. Lencioni placed the burden of our misery primarily on our mangers. Their lack of interest in us as “people with unique lives” and the failure to help us find relevance in our work is the root of our misery. While I agree with the fundamentals of his arguement, I think that our understanding of ourselves and our core Nature plays a big part in the equation as well.
For instance, a pastor friend of mine mapped into the 3:9 Principle almost exclusively in the “Heart” nature. Our natural tendancy is to say, “Of course, after all, he is a pastor…”. The fact is though, that the correlation to Nature and Occupation is self-driven. He could have chosen any field to pursue. Often times life forces us down a particular path regardless of our core Nature. My friend is actually in the vast minority - he is someone whose work directly lines up with his Nature. As a result, he is one of the few people who can actually say, “I can’t believe I get paid to do this work!”
For most people, we either do not know or fail to acknowledge our true Nature. Rather, we are influenced by social, economic or physical circumstances and we end up in an occupation which may conflict, or at best co-exist with our Nature. When this situation occurs, which I believe happens more often than not, then our perception of our work is impacted. When we are not working in the area of our Nature we become more easily frustrated, we struggle to succeed or we become apathetic.
This doesn’t mean we need to run out and quit our jobs so we can go back to school (Intellectual) or spend time philosophying about God (Spiritual) and such. What it means is that we need to find the aspects of our job that play to our Nature. If someone is highly Relational and works in a technical industry, then it would be in their best interest to find a job that requires interacting with people and building relationships based on trust and like interests. Each Nature has a particular aspect that can shape the way we approach a job, and no two people will find the exact same formula for success.
If we strive to understand ourselves by finding our unique design and then apply that knowledge to our work, then we will be much more likely to find satisfaction in the job and avoid misery. As Mr. Lencioni suggests, improving the boss-employee dynamic can significantly reduce the chances of having a miserable job. Your understanding of your core Nature will not only benefit yourself, but it will also help you in communicating your needs and your strengths to your boss. That in turn can improve your manager’s ability to help you find relevance and success in the workplace.
So, if you haven’t yet, make the time to find your unique 3:9 Principle mapping and then leverage that knowledge in your work. You might just be amazed at the difference it will make!
